Serial Optimist
Right on schedule, I received one of twenty-nine phone calls from Sandler on his bus ride home from school today. Usually, the first sentence out of his mouth is an enthusiastic, “Can we go skateboarding when I get home?!” Today was different, however, his voice was cracking and I could tell tears were about to follow. As he tried to be strong and get a few words out, I stopped him and asked what was wrong. He started crying and said he watched the news at school and it was just way too sad. Not only had he been processing the loss of a very special teacher the week before, but as a way to catch up on current events, he and his classmates learned about international and local news reports which were flooded with tragedy.
Young or old, empath or not, the last few weeks have hosted some overwhelmingly sad and unbearable stories for us all. Most of which I knew I could not protect him from hearing; some I had to share with him and try my best to explain in ways that he could understand. It was extremely painful, but in typical Sandler fashion, he ended up shining a little sunlight on some very dark circumstances.
Before he made his first of many phone calls to me as he was boarding the bus home, I happened to be on the phone getting confirmation that we were going to get the opportunity to go on a weekend getaway to Camp Woodward (a skateboard camp he has been dreaming of going to ever since he started skating). I knew it was going to be life changing for him, but I did not realize the timing of such news would actually fix everything that was wrong in the world — at least in Sandler’s world.
Right after his epic breakdown about the current events, I told him I had some information that might make him feel a little better; I asked if a future trip to Woodward would help. His response was a loud scream followed by, “That will make absolutely everything all ‘bettew’!” Of course he asked the typical questions: When are we going? How many minutes until we leave? What should we pack? How many “months” are we staying? Then he paused—which he does not do very often—and asked me what the person’s name was who let me know we were going? I thought it was an odd question because we do not know anyone at the camp, but I told him her name was Karen. Sandler followed with, “Karen is the most beautiful name I have ever heard and I think Woodward is going to be the most beautiful place in the world.” It was as if Karen and Woodward took him right out of the darkness and placed him in his Utopia.
What I found so profound in regard to Sandler’s relationship with skateboarding, is that not only does he see it as his sanctuary, but also that it can fix most things wrong in his world. Not just because it is an outlet, but because it is paired with such an incredible community. A village that has given him the friends and family to help him overcome hardships. A tribe that continues to root him on and give him love during all times — especially when he is hurt (both physically and/or emotionally). It was important for him to know the person’s name who gave him something to look forward to; it made him happy on a day he was so hopeless. That person was responsible for his newfound optimism.
He thanked me, skateboarding and Karen until he finally fell asleep. I am eternally grateful for all of the people skateboarding continues to put in our path — and for mending Sandler’s broken heart today. Our whole hearts and broken hearts go out to all who have lost those they love.
- Nikki